Take Two: Cavs at Timberwolves Preview

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Anderson Varejao showing off his “I play for Cleveland” face.

Where: Target Center

When: 7pm CST

See It: FSN/In-Person

Hear It: WCCO-AM 830/ In-person (As long as you turn around in your seat, but you may weird out the people behind you if you do that.)

Sorry, Cleveland. The blows just never stop coming, do they? Oh, you didn’t know that I overlooked your name on tonight’s schedule, and wrote an entire preview on next Friday’s game? Well, I did. It’s not personal, it’s just that you’re 4-12, and missing two of your top three players. I mean, Anderson Varejao is nice, but I’m probably not tuning in just for him. Watching Tristan Thompson get his shot blocked might be fun, but may get sad by halftime.

With the 21st and 24th best offense and defense in the NBA, you really don’t scare anyone. If it weren’t for Varejao and his rebounding, the Wizards would probably be making, “At least we’re not Cleveland!” jokes since you really don’t have anything you’re even just average at other than three point shooting.

I suppose it’s just as well Kyrie Irving and Dion Waiters are out, because whenever I have watched this Cavs team, they’ve somehow forgot they have one of the league’s best ballhandlers and played him as the off-guard.

And then, that bench, which could only be described as diseased when you glance up and down the roster. If the Wolves are fair, maybe they should sit Andrei Kirilenko another game, or go four on five to even the playing field. Kevin Love may literally be able to beat this team with one hand; that’s not a joke. But, hey, at least Pekovic versus Varejao will be a fun matchup to watch!

The fact that Cavs fans can even get out of bed in the morning is  a true testament to the perseverance of the human spirit. Although, if you’re from Cleveland, you can probably get through anything by now.  I mean, your starting shooting guard’s name is “Boobie” for Pete’s sake! At least show some self respect.

(Kidding, Cleveland. Love you.)

Projected Starting Fives: 

Jeremy Pargo — PG — Luke Ridnour

Daniel “Boobie” Gibson — SG — Malcolm Lee

Alonzo Gee — SF — Andrei Kirilenko

Tristan Thompson — PF — Kevin Love

Anderson Varejao — C — Nikola Pekovic

About Derek James

In addition to writing for Howlin' T-Wolf, Derek James writes about basketball Hardwood Paroxysm in the ESPN TrueHoop Network and covers the Charlotte Bobcats for SB Nation’s Rufus on Fire. Andray Blatche and Isaiah Rider follow him on Twitter.

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